History where the rubber meets the road. (or, what really happened back then)
1. Humans haven't been around for more than ten thousand years.
2. The farther you go back in time, the greater the chance of something currently impossible happening for real.
3. The dinosaurs died once a meteor struck the earth and caused it to spin, which started the next day.
4. God made the air thinner the higher altitude you go up so that when people build a tower too high, they'll start speaking different languages because of oxygen deprivation.
4.5. White light was really white until God made it into a spectrum after the Great Flood.
5. Moses really parted the red sea.
6. Moses really watched a bush burn without being burnt.
6.5 Moses can turn a staff into a snake whenever he feels like it.
7. King David had a bright orangish-red beard.
7.5. Saul had a black beard.
8. Jesus is a perfect human, he was born on January 1, 0 A.D.  at 0:00:00 A.M. (give or take 6 years) without private parts and was a celibate non-breeder. And he had long hair.
9. Jesus died from getting nailed to a cross and later speared by worthless romans.
10. A common failure mode of an apostle is martyrdom.
11. King Arthur and his pagan gods (that he has at banquets) exists in the 80s realm, and not where the rubber meets the road (which is reality).
12. Viking helmets either have horns most of the time or else they have wings.
13. William Wallace had long hair and wore a tartan pleated kilt.
14. Almost all priests were straight during the Middle Ages.
15. A crazed albino monk smoked a laced bone and wrote a story about Jesus..
16. The Trinity was invented by Catholics who needed more gods and more witchy friends.
17. Columbus didn't discover squat.
18. The pilgrims really had turkey, mashed potatoes without skins or garlic, bread stuffing, corn on the cob, and cranberry sauce.
19. The Indians (american) broke up around 1910 A.D.
20. No one ever succeeded in casting a spell or telling your future.
21. The Holocaust really happened.
21. Paul McCartney is not dead as of June 4 2006.
22. Anastasia is about as alive as an imploded CRT.
24. There was a New Age fad in Spring 1994.
23. Al Gore did not invent the internet.
24. Jesus comes back after you die.
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